I get asked all the time,

“Out of all the specialties in healthcare, why do you choose dementia and geriatric patients?”

You can call them demented.

You can say they have Alzheimer’s.

Yes, they’re geriatric.

But to me?

They’re the only people left on the planet who do not get offended.

I mean—where else, other than a mortuary, can you go to work where no one has a fragile ego, no one clings to a victim mentality, and everyone accepts criticism like it’s a gold medal? Not one person lets the misfortune of a family member they’ve never met—because they’ve been dead for over a century—dictate where exactly on their sleeve they should wear their feelings.

Take blunt criticism.

Most people lose their minds over it.

In our facility, a former prominent coach sits directly across from a former Miss Alabama at the dinner table. One evening, he looks at her and says,

“I sure would love to love you, but I just can’t love anybody with more hair on their chin than I have.”

The rest of the world would call that brutal.

Miss Alabama? She just smiled brightly and said,

“I know Jesus is coming, and we are going too—”

No offense taken. No spiraling. Just vibes.

Then there’s perceived rudeness—

Another big trigger for the easily offended. But not in geriatrics. Because after you’ve told the same gentleman five times to get back in bed, it’s now 2:30 a.m., and he looks at you and says,

“I ain’t getting back in bed, and I ain’t taking a whore like you with me,”

The only thing you perceive is that the recliner he’s been fighting to reach all night is probably the better option anyway.

Personal boundaries?

Oh, those get interesting.

When you have a hallway full of dementia patients, doors don’t always get locked. Sometimes a woman will crawl into bed with a man—not sexual at all. She just really had to pee and didn’t want to pee in her own bed.

Now, the gentleman could have been deeply offended.

Instead, he just wanted clean Fruit of the Looms, fresh sheets, and for her to go pee in someone else’s room.

And then there’s being offended by assumptions about beliefs.

Geriatric patients don’t remember what they believe.

Nonverbal cues? Eye rolls. Hand jerks. Head twitches.

Do you know what happens in a nursing home when someone does that?

We don’t get offended. We check to see if they’re a DNR—or if we need to start CPR and call an ambulance.

People getting offended on behalf of family members they never met—because those people have been dead for over a century—is honestly comical, logically speaking.

The truth is, geriatric patients don’t remember any of the family members they have actually met.

Alzheimer’s patients don’t spiral over tone, boundaries, or assumptions—because being offended is an emotional reaction, not a logical process. And when that part of the brain checks out, so does the drama.

In other words: it’s not logical to be offended.

Being offended is an emotion.

Alzheimer’s and dementia affect emotional regulation, self-awareness, social judgment, and memory—but here’s the part people forget:

My patients can still use logic.

Procedural and practical logic often remains intact.

They can still:

• Follow routines
• Solve familiar problems
• Make basic cause-and-effect decisions
• Use learned skills (“If I’m cold, I need a sweater”)

So the next time your feelings get hurt, your boundaries get crossed, someone criticizes you, or you read too much into a nonverbal cue—remember this:

Stop reacting with emotion.

Use your logic brain.

Because if you live long enough, you’re going to have to anyway—

you might as well start practicing now.